Lately I feel as if I am losing a step or two when raiding. I've been concentrating on others so much that I am starting to make some simple mistakes that I never made before. Nothing game breaking. I still move when I need to, where I need to and how I need to but my DPS is seeming to suffer more and more each week.
Some examples of things I noticed myself doing.
I am sometimes losing the Improved Steady Shot buff even in situations where I do not need to move. Or hitting three in a row when I only need two.
I am occasionally not doing the quick switch to fox when moving whereas I used to always do it and now I sometimes just don't and it is not like I forgot, I remembered, I just don't do it.
I am also falling into the habit of waiting on shots when I know an interrupt will be needed even if the job to interrupt is not up to me, but because I am afraid it is going to be missed or the person might die and I will need to be ready to do it.
All of these things and other little factors have meant that my performance is not even close to what I know I can do. For arguments sake, if I were just another player in a more hardcore group, I could see me being dropped.
It is so bad that I did less DPS on Al'Akir (13K) then I do on the target dummy, with no buffs. Those numbers are just not acceptable for me.
I wonder what is the reasoning for this.
It could be burnout. I've been burnt out on the game for a long time now. I only play because I feel I have to for the sake of the raid team.
It could be I am stressed with trying to down new bosses so I am over analyzing everyone else which might not be a good thing for me as a player even if it is sometimes needed as a raid leader.
It could be that my disappointment with other things in the game has started to flow into raiding, which has been the best thing this expansion.
It could be our lack of progress is pecking away at me knowing we could do more but we are not getting it done only raiding 4 hours a week, if that much.
It could be because I am frustrated that there is a guild on my server that is 12/12 and 2/13 and when looking at their world of logs their top DPS would barely be 5th in our raid group meaning it is all my fault as a raid leader that we are not ahead of them in progression.
It could be it is our extremely limited raid schedule making me feel like others are not doing all they can so why should I.
It could be many things but there is one thing for sure I know it is. It is not good for me as a player. If I know I can do better I am not happy with myself. Even if we down the bosses, I did not do my best which means I did not do good.
You don't need to do good to down a boss and you don't need to be bad to not down one. Never assume either. You can down a boss and still do badly. Lately I feel as if I am doing badly.
The worst part of it all is that I am getting to the point where I don't care any more and that is what worries me. I would not want a raider on my team that didn't care so that means I would not want me on my team.
This only seems to exist in raids however, so that is why I tie it to what is going on in raids.
Yesterday I was in a heroic ZG and we had the lightning archeology boss and everyone died on it and I soloed it from 40% to dead. I am still on my game there. If something like that happened in a raid, I would have died at 39%.
I want to get my groove back in raids, but I am not even sure how I lost it.
A Self-Fulfilling Prophecy
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