Thursday, December 27, 2012

What Happens on the Farm...

What happens on the farm stays on the farm.  At least until I make a post about it.  No, I am not talking about the dwarves and what they do with their sheep.  I do not even want to think about that.  Why did you bring it up?  Now I am going to have nightmares thank you very much.

The visitor...
One day while tending to my farm on a bright sunny day and fending off vermin and other unwelcome visitors I received a visit from someone I was not expecting but not exactly of the unwanted variety.  The little daily quest marker appeared on my screen when there were none there before.  I was half done farming and I knew there was nothing there but now there was.

I walked outside of the farm and went looking for it.  While the marker appeared to be on my farm I knew it could not be on my farm so I went looking for it.  As soon as I stepped out of my farm the marker disappeared.

Was I imaging things?  I mounted up and flew around quickly and nothing.  So I went back to tending to my crops and as soon as I stepped on my farm the quest marker appeared again.

Ah ha I said to myself, it is in my cabin.  I walked up the stairs and to my surprise there was a blingtron sitting in my cabin in the corner.  What was he doing here?  I am not an engineer and I did not place him here.  My farm has never had any visitors that could have come and left him here for me.  So he must have appeared from a different dimension.  Either way, free goodies from blingy.  Thanks buddy.

Did you hear that the dwarves have started a new safe sex initiative? 
They paint the legs of the sheep that kick.

Did you hear the new motto of Ironforge?
Where men are men and sheep are scared.

How many dwarves does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One, but you need to pry him off the sheep first.

I Kill You...
Everyone knows the fun of the farm on a PvP server and even on a non PvP servers.  Need to escape battle quick, jump in your farm.  Need to stage an ambush, have everyone stay in the their farms and jump out at the same time.  There are lots of ways an innovative PvPer can use the farm to their advantage but there are also a few odds things that happen on the farm once in a while even if you do not PvP.

One day while farming on a rainy day at the farm a bird popped up and I sent my pet after him, hitting lynx rush in the process.  I did not notice it right away but I ended up flagged for PvP.  On my farm?  From fighting a bird?  Excuse me.  It seems that you can fight someone on their farm if they are flagged but hitting them in not an exact science.  You have to get lucky hitting them as they are not actually there, so to speak, so you have to use AoE sort of things.

I threw an explosive trap where my pet was fighting shortly after and a snake trap a few steps away from it and sat and watched to see if anything happened.  Each minute I would lay them again.  After a few minutes of laying them and just sitting there watching and seeing nothing I went back to farming only to see my snakes pop out all over the place.

Woot, I got me a hordie on their farm and they will never even know it was me.  I tried laying traps again but none went off and being hunters have no AoE what so ever I could not do much more, I need a target to do my abilities, but I could imagine the fun I could have with a class that has an AoE ability.  I could kill people on their farm while on my farm and they would never know it was me.  Well, unless they were smart enough to look at their combat log that is.

Where do you get virgin wool from?
Ugly sheep.

Why did the sheep cross the road?
To get away from the dwarf.

Why did dwarves make ironforge at the top of a mountain?
So when they took the sheep to the ledges they would push back.

Do I know you?...
While I mentioned my pet has visited another persons farm, and I could tell that by him attacking that person and flagging me and I know that blingy has visited me as well those are not the only occurrences of visitors I've had over the course of doing my farm work.

I've had a warlock imp actually look like it was following me around for a short time.  When I moved, he moved, and no, I was not on my warlock at the time.  I was on my priest.  My priest also seems to have a thing for hunters pets because they always love to visit her on her farm.

Not once, not twice, but three times she has had a hunters pet just hanging out with her while she was farming.  One of those three times was actually funny because I knew the pet.  It belonged to a friend of mine as it is a unique pet and I've never seen anyone but him use it.  I asked him, are you farming right now and he said yes, why.  I told him that his pet was on my farm.  We had a nice laugh about it.

The pet did not have a name over it but it was targetable.  I was able to touch it, so I pet his pet, and shortly after when he was done farming and left his pet left with him.  It was nice to have a visitor for a while however and being I am a hunter at heart I liked that it was a hunters pet.

It makes me wonder how many other farms has my pet visited and even more importantly, why did he not bring back any gifts.  If I went on vacation I would bring him back a gift.

So while I have seen hunters pets and warlock imps I have yet to see a mages elemental, but I have heard one before.  The wosh wosh water sound is unmistakable and if I really zoomed in I could see a faint outline of the little patterns of water he left on the ground.  Seems our pets get around.

Why do dwarves wear high boots?
So they can put the sheep's legs in them so they do not get away.

Did you hear that the dwarves have discovered a brand new use for sheep?

Did you know a dwarf invented velcro?
He needed something for his gloves to keep the sheep from getting away.

Stop messing with my chickens...
One day yoonie and I were chilling talking about crop returns with dog staring at us, presumably wanting some food, when all the chickens on my farm went insane.  They started running all over the place with these little skulls over their heads.  Feared no doubt, but from what?

Yoon and I split up, he went to the front of the farm and me the back and we tried to look for anything out of the ordinary.  Just then, the chickens went crazy again.  Running all over the place and trembling with fear.  It was then that I saw my farm was under attack.  A death and decay landed on my crops, directly in the center.  Yoon, I yelled, run for your life.

The chickens were being feared by a priests psychic scream it seems and all other AoE effects were also appearing on my farm, all at once.  It must have been a busy day on the farm because between the consecrations, the death and decays and the chickens running around like, excuse the pun, chickens with their heads cut off, it seemed like everyone had it in for those little buggers.

You want to D&D my carrots and feel strongly about it, go ahead if that floats your boat, but please leave my poor chickens alone, what did they ever do to you.  I needed to bring a farm animal psychologist in to talk to my chickens.  They had nightmares for the next week thanks to that.

A gnome told a dwarf he could make his sheep sound like a cheerleader.  The dwarf of course did not think it was possible.  He challenged the gnome to put up or shut up and the gnome accepted.  He said for the dwarf to come back the next day.

When the dwarf came back the gnome said to put the sheep on that metal platform and just listen as the sheep would become a cheerleader.

The gnome stepped back and lit the fuse and it made a ssshhhhh sound.
Then the platform exploded and it made a boom sound.
Then the sheep went flying through the air yelling baaaaaa.

The dwarf, upset the gnome had just blown up his sheep grabbed him by the neck and started to strangle him when the gnome eeked out some words explaining.  I told you I could make your sheep sound like a cheerleader, it went ssshhhh-boom-baaaaa.

Bring out your dead...
Have you ever found a dead body on your farm?  I have, more than once.  One day I even entered my farm to find the skeletons of three bodies of the recently deceased.  It made me wonder how can you die on your farm?

The mobs can kill you I guess but you would have to actively try to die to die against one of them.  Either by pulling a lot of them or not fighting back.  Even in poor gear with poor skills it would not be easy to die to them so people have to be dying another way.

I took it upon myself to try and figure out how these people managed to die but I could not tell anything from the bones.  They were all in the farming area which would lead me to believe they did die to critter damage but there has to be other ways to die on the farm.

Flying high up and releasing will surely mean death on the farm.  Can a lock still hellfire themselves to death?  I have not tried recently but the last time I used it I don't recall it doing a lot of damage any more.  I am sure I could kill myself with it but it would take some time.  Could people cross farm PvP and actually kill someone?  I do think it is possible.  I've attacked people on other farms and I have seen their effects on mine.  My poor chickens are still recovering form them.

I'll bet every one of us has had some skeletons on the farm but it is a good thing what happens on the farm stays on the farm.  Including all those dead bodies people have laying around.

A lot of strange things happen on the farm and thank god it is phased and what happens on the farm stays on the farm or we just might not ever be able to get the images of the dwarves and those poor sheep out of our heads.  Strange things happen on the farm, strange things indeed.



    -roo excuse me while I get another bottle of "Woolite"

  2. On a PvP server there is a tremendous amount of lvl 90s killing low levels as they phase in at the inn, or land at the now inconveniently placed flight path. Attempting to sprint to your farm for sanctuary occasionally saves you, but the disparity between an 85 and a 90 means all too often the DoT's kill you. That could be the source of the skeletons on your farm.

    On one occasion my 85 rogue was saved from certain death by a priest spamming an AoE heal on her farm at the exact moment I leapt down into mine with only a fraction of health left and several feral druid dots still ticking on me, so heals cross over too. I whispered to thank her for saving me and she was confused as she had no idea she'd healed me. It took a moment of conversation for us to figure out what happened.

    1. That is a great story. Healing through farms too. Awesome.

    2. maybe Inn's should be "safe zones" on a pvp server. :) Just goes to show ya the amount of lvl 90 bullies out there. In the words of Jimmy Steward in "The Far Country" when he found his pistol unloaded (by John McIntire) to John McIntire - "Have to give yourself an edge".

      I saw the bling robot today for the first time - on my farm of 4 plots (just started it). It was in the big rock with his head sticking above it, lol. And I have seen skeletons, but I figured they must have fallen to their death (I know I have a time or two).

      In another time - this night elf was walking up and down the side of the river looking for a way across. Finally he looks up and sees another night elf on the other side. He yells out "How do I get to the other side?" at which the other night elf yells back and says "You are on the other side!"