Tuesday, September 1, 2015

An Ode to Flying, Oh, the Places You'll Go

Soon flying will be upon us and for a while I was thinking of writing a post about what I plan to do when we get flying but instead I figured I would do something else.  I could write about things I have been putting off for a while now while I waited.  Things like leveling more characters, exploring some more, doing some archaeology, doing more pet battles, you know the things that flying makes more enjoyable.

But I am sure many people have written stuff like that and I like to be different so I present to you, for your amusement hopefully, a poem if you will, stolen in tone and more than a few words from the great Dr. Suess in this story, Oh, the Places You'll Go.

Please enjoy.

Today is your day.
You're off to Great Places!
You're off and away!

You have ideas from your questbook.
You'll use mounts and not shoes,
You can steer yourself
any direction you choose.
You're on your own. And you know what you know.
And YOU are the guy who'll decide where to go.

No flight masters passenger as you look over 'em with care.
To some you will say, "I don't need you down there."
With your head full of plans on a mount and not feet,
Looking for pets to capture to make part of your fleet.

And you may not find any pets
you'll want to bring right home.
At least not right away as it goes
so you'll head to the next zone.

It's opener here
in the wide open air.

Out there things can happen
and frequently do
to people that fly
no more footsy for you.

And then things start to happen,
archaeology found orge stew?
I'd suggest you don't eat it.
But I guess that's something you knew.


You'll be on your way up!
You'll be seeing great sights!
You'll join the high fliers
who soar to high heights.

You won't lag behind, because you'll have the speed.
You'll pass the grounded gang, in the air you will lead.
Wherever you fly, you'll be best of the best.
Wherever you go, you'll be atop all the rest.

Except when you land.
Because, not all stops will be planned.

Because you never know what you'll see
trust me that is true
the rare mob here
and a missed treasure too
yes it can happen to you.

You can get all hung up
collecting what you had missed.
but you know you'll fly on.
one more pet off your list.

You'll come down from the air
for a dig sight here or there.
And the chances are, then,
that you'll find a pristine celfhoof hair.

But when you hit a Slump,
you're not in for much fun.
Un-slumping yourself
with flying is easily done.

You will come to a place where the map is not clear
Some trees have some danglers just dangling there.
Flying through them you could scrape your elbow or chin!
Do you dare to stay out? Do you dare to go in?
How much can you lose? How much can you win?

And IF you go in, should you turn left or right...
or right-and-three-quarters? Or, maybe, not quite?
Or go around back and sneak in from behind?
Simple it is when you have flying you'll find,
for a high flying flier you made up your mind.

You can get so confused
so many places to race
dodging rylaks at a break-necking pace
and landing at that rep grinding space,
headed, I fear, toward a most useless place.
But it is YOUR useless Place...

...for people just waiting.
on the top of a hill you go
or out far to sea you can go
or landing on a branch you can go
in the fog, rain, sun or the snow
or flying around for the queue to pop Yes or No
or exploring while you watch the queue timer grow.
Everyone is just waiting.

Waiting for the fish to bite
or waiting for that blue wild pet
or waiting around for the raid to start
or waiting, for the rare to spawn
or to get to the next dig sight
or to reach heights you have not met
or to get invited to that pug
Everyone is just waiting.

That's not for you!

Somehow you'll escape
with all that flying and soaring
You'll find the bright places
where the game is not boring.

With your mounts wings flip-flapping,
once more you'll ride high!
Ready for anything under the sky.
Ready because you're that kind of a guy!

Oh, the places you'll go! There is fun to be done!
There are places to visit and pet battles to be won.
And the magical things you dig up like an orc disco ball
it will make you the winning-est winner of all.
Fame! You'll be as famous, as famous can be,
with the whole wide world watching you fly around on TV.

Except when they don't
Because, gnomes making tvs, they won't.

I'm afraid that some times
you'll play lonely games too.
Flying around by yourself
'cause you need time for just you.

All Alone!
even if others are there or not,
because in the air you feel freedom
and you'll like that a lot.

And when you're alone, there's a very good chance
you'll hunt down creatures that scare you right out of your pants.
There are some, down the road between gorgrond and tanaan,
that can scare you so much you won't know what your planning.

But on you will go
to face the beasties most foul.
On you will go
to sneak up on that pet with a prowl.
On you will go
casting your chrominus' howl.
Onward to many
a legendary battle,
though your tush may get sore
at least your mount has a saddle.

On and on you will fly
And I know you'll fly far
and face up to your challenges
whatever they are.

You'll get caught up, of course,
as you already know.
You'll get caught up with all there is to do
avoiding those many strange birds as you go.
So be sure when you fly
Fly with great care and great tact
and remember that Life is
a Great Balancing Act.
Just never forget to be dexterous and deft.
And never mix up your dismount button with the one on your left.

And will you succeed?
Yes! You will, indeed!
(98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed.)


be your name Buxbaum or Bixby or Bray
or Mordecai Ali Van Allen O'Shea,
You're off the Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your flying mount is waiting.
So...get on your way!

Note:  Reposted September 1st, because now we are finally getting flying.


  1. its not purple nor even yellow
    I think GE is a keen fellow
    to write us a poem about flight
    as Doctor Seuss might
    but I differ, when it could make those who suffer without flying
    and will leave those same crying.

    1. If the post on the front page of MMOC was right many people still have not unlocked flight yet.

    2. Unless I missed something, the MMOC article counts the number of characters that have unlocked flying... which is flawed as the achievement is account bound.

      For example, I have 7 level 100 characters. I've only bothered to completely unlock flying on 1 of them. Sure I'm doing rep grinds in Tanaan on others, but that is mainly because it is a secondary affect of me being there grinding out baleful and empowered items to gear up my lowly alts.

    3. I agree, I have 11 and only 1 has unlocked it. No need to do it on others.

      So take what MMOC said with a grain of salt. Maybe they considered that, maybe they did not. We do not know as they did not give us enough details to read an informed number from it. They did state 5.2 characters on 2M accounts (IIRC) so maybe they are taking that into consideration.

      What is really more telling is the fact they were only able to find 2M accounts with a max level character to check it on and a fair deal of player have more than one account. Meaning the active player base is even lower than their sub numbers show. Way lower.

      With that said, from the people I speak to that are active in my guild only 2 have not got it yet and one of those two only came back last week. Everyone else has had it for a long time.

      If I had to guess, (complete and total guess) I would say their 15% have it is probably the other way around, maybe 15% don't.

    4. I could not find that article. oh well, no biggie. and I found MMO-C to be a terrible web site with too many ads slowing it down and dreadful to follow to read. As bad as Icey-Veins. Yeah, I will knock them. They are more about everything else these days than WOW and like I said before only concern is for raiders.

      Hey take care and why did you not say "thank you" to me for my reply, which pretty much says it was good. :P damned night elves.


      hear the one about the night elf that was ran over by a grand ice mammoth? a gnome did it.

    5. I use an add blocker so can't say I have ever seen an ad there, but that is why.

      Thank you. :)

      Was he a member of gnomeland security?

    6. Gnome Angels.... the rough bunch of gnomes.

    7. This comment has been removed by the author.

    8. "Oh, I have slipped the surly bonds of Draenor,
      And danced the skies on laughter-silvered wings;
      Sunward I've climbed and joined the tumbling mirth of sun-split clouds -
      and done a hundred things You have not dreamed of -
      wheeled and soared and swung high in the sunlit silence.
      Hovering there I've chased the shouting wind along
      and flung my eager mount through footless halls of air."


      with warmest regards to Pilot Officer John Gillespie Magee, Jr.

  2. Oh I do so love Epic Verse :D Nice one, Grumpy!

  3. Well done sir elf. I always enjoy the Bard Seuss and your take was nicely inspired :)

    Hopefully we'll be aloft soon...

    1. Thank you, and fly we shall, second star to the right and straight on til morning.

    2. My god the man is quoting Tinkerbell.

    3. A good line is a good line. :P

  4. Enjoyed that. Would have enjoyed it even more if flight was dropping today. Damn you, Blizzard!

    1. An elf could dream. I was hoping an 8 hour down time might mean flight. But you never know. Glad you enjoyed it.

    2. Well, we're two weeks beyond your original posting of this and with flying now arriving, I can say that having flying available to me hasn't made WoW that much more enjoyable. Don't get me wrong. Flying is a godsend and should have been in long ago. Really, it should have been in for all of WoD.

      Rather, it simply can't save WoW for me -- and from itself -- at this point. I will use it to grab the treasures I don't have, mostly in Nagrand b/c I couldn't be bothered to do that running around to take gliders crapfest. I'd intended to do more Tanaan pet battles for the last rare pet I need, but honestly I don't have the will to play to do even that.

      I'm sad about this state of affairs, but only just barely. The state of the game has become like moving. I pretty much never miss a house when I leave it -- no matter how much I loved living there -- because moving sucks so very, very, very much that by the time you do so, you are just so freaking happy to have it over that missing a house seems trivial compared to the horror you've just survived. I've been playing since launch mostly with the same folks and while I'm going to miss the folks, I still can barely muster an "ehhh" about taking an upcoming extended (permanent?) break from the game. The lack of sadness is making more sad than anything else.

      Damn you, Blizzard. Damn you.

  5. I wonder how many times you'll get to re-post this during Legion? ;-)

    1. If flight is not included on release I think they are in for some sub trouble. They need to have realized that by now.

  6. Anon, Grumpy's former Guild Leader:

    Off...off to the Auction House I go,
    carrying my bag of coins in my hand,
    seeking medallions of the legion so
    I may go soar across the land.

    To hell with Blizzard's way of play
    even if it takes a ton of gold for me today.

    What, medallions are hard to come by,
    say it ain't so, oh my gosh, oh no,
    well even so, I will continue to try
    because into the air I want to go.

    To hell with Blizzard's way of play
    even if it takes a ton of gold for me today.

    1. hec, even I had 4 of them! Didn't need them, but I had 4 :)

  7. I think I'm going crazy... didn't you post this a bit ago? It says sept 1 now... confused...

    1. You are imagining things.

      You are feeling sleepy.

      You took the blue pill.

      There is no spoon.

    2. Oh nevermind, I saw your note at the bottom, I was seriously freaking, especially since also seem to had read the adds adds adds post some time before too...

    3. that's a good one James! What a knee-slapper.


      remember what the cat said! "We are all mad here"

  8. Since this is now the 3rd and I don't see a newer post from you, I will put right here, a bug, a slip, a "working as it is suppose too" feature. I just did the "Battle for Shatt" in Talaador on a toon that did not do it. Had flying going down to the quest giver I was suppose to meet. Did all 4 stages and won (I don't think you can lose these even if you tried) got the battle and when I went to fly away, guess what - no flying. Rode all the way (which didn't bother me, as I still like to ride on the ground) to a flight path and then, I had flying.

    Sent a ticket to the gm's and got back, "you completed the battle, what's the problem?" Hmmm, it was about not fixing the flying, that's whut.

    So, there will be still areas that one will not be able fly from or too. My only question is - "are there no fly areas that will dismount one in mid-air and drop you like a rock?"

    Reminds me of a song. Want to hear it, it goes

    When I was a little roo
    And the battles would call my name
    I’d say, “Now who do . . .
    Who do you think you’re fooling?”
    I’m a consecrated roo
    Singer in a dwarven choir
    Oh, my mount loves me, she loves me
    She gets out her wings and flys me
    Oh, she drops me like a rock
    Over unseen no fly areas
    And she drops me
    She drops me, drops me, drops me, drops me


  9. Anyone see GE? This is unlike him being gone so long, unless he is sick or maybe vacation, possibly?

    Well, if you are sick or hurt, I'm having a pint to your speedy recovery, mate!